Every Mother is a Working Mother

February 7, 2013 , In: Balance, Motherhood , With: 9 Comments

Every Mother


Today is the day, had I stuck with my job, my maternity leave would have ended and I would have ridden the bus, then the metro, and then drudged through the urine soaked passage into the elevator, and finally sat down at my cubicle to start another day of work.  Instead, I am at home with my 11 month old son.

It sounds blissful, doesn’t it?  Well, typing it I think it should sound blissful.  But it’s not all bliss.  It’s hard work.  He’s still not a great sleeper, the days are cold outside (sometimes too cold for walking) and hours upon hours spent with a baby are not always easy.  It can be isolating, especially when the weather is so cold that I don’t even want to heat up the car to get outside.

I was at Melons & Clementines the other day, and saw the above quote.  I almost started crying.  Yes, I thought, every mother is a working mother.  No matter what you do, you are working hard, damn hard.  I wondered to myself then why if it was such hard work I didn’t just head back to the cube.  And the answer came fairly easy.  Working at some job to achieve some arbitrary bottom line for a massive corporation can be pretty soul sucking, but when I look at my baby and he smiles I know it’s all worth it.  Sounds cliché but it’s coming from the heart.  And I know for me, it’s what’s right for me and my family right now.

I recently read Lake Jane’s post about her decision not to work, and it struck so many chords with me.  One in particular was justifying the decision to others which she wrote is just about projecting her own insecurities.  I realized that this is what I do every time I justify my choice.  I recently had to fill out a form asking occupation, and I just wrote ‘Mom’ and felt a bit mortified.  We define ourselves in this society so much by our career, and saying your a stay at home mom is a bit of a conversation ender (even more so than saying you are in insurance!)  But I need to get over that, and stick to my guns.  This is what I want, this is my choice, and this is what makes me and my family happy and makes it all work.  Still, it’s tough…  but I suppose every change, every hard decision is tough, even if it is the right decision.

  1. Reply

    With all the metro shutdowns today – I bet you were extra happy not to have to worry about transit today…

    I hope you get used to your new “title.” It’s an important job 🙂

      • Michelle
      • February 7, 2013

      No Kidding! The metro has been a real fail lately!


  2. Reply

    My wife also quit her job when my daughter was born 2+ years ago. Now we have a son as well, and we know we did the right decision. It’s hard work, but my wife loves it (imagine a toddler PLUS a baby at home!).

    Nice, moving post.

    • Sarah
    • February 8, 2013

    Great post Michelle!!
    It’s really clear that you made the right decision.

    I think having to leave your child at daycare- seeing that little face as you drive hurriedly away so you can make it to the ‘cube’ on time probably rallies the hard days at home with your kid as well as the justification of deciding to stay home. I bet there are lots of moms out there that wish that they had the choice!!

      • Michelle
      • February 8, 2013

      Hi Sarah

      Yes, I meant to write that I am grateful I have the choice to stay home. And I hope I didn’t make it sound like going to work was easier – I think it’s really really tough. It’s all tough isn’t it! ach..

    • Shawna
    • February 8, 2013

    Thanks for sharing Michelle. I couldn’t have been an easy decision, and you should be proud that you actually were able to build up the courage to follow your heart. You are one of the hardest working moms that I know, and even with everything that you have going on, you still have managed to be a huge support to some of us newer moms. I think this was your calling, and as your friend, I couldn’t be more proud to share your story with others. Thanks for being such a great example.

      • Michelle
      • February 8, 2013

      Wow – thanks Shawna! So many of life’s decisions are tough! And I’m so glad that I can be of any help to you or any new (or old!) Mom!

  3. Reply

    Way to go Michelle. What you do is the most difficult and beautiful any person can do in this life. As important as manu things are, nothing is more important than raising a beautiful human being. Everything starts there. Bravo.

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Michelle Little

Writer & Photographer

Originally from the prairies and now in Montreal, I love exploring new places, eating great food and modern design. I'm mom of two wild things and paper and cake make me happy. Photographing your cutie family would make me very happy.

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